Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Sending you a warm Thank You!
If I could send all of you a big Thank you card for your words of encouragement and let you know how much they have provided me with nourishment through this difficult time, I would. I have reread your comments from time to time and they have kept me going. Your words have helped me to suffer patiently. THANK YOU From the bottom of my heart!
Charlie barely got through his five day chemo last week in the hospital.
The night before he went into the hospital he had mentioned to me he was dreading this chemo treatment. I tried to reassure him that this was the last one in the hospital and he was almost done. Monday in the hospital, as soon as I got Charlie settled into his room, Steph (one of our oncology nurses who has been with us through this whole ordeal) asked me how things were going and confided in me that she had felt Charlie had lost some of his fight. I had mentioned to her that Charlie was hallucinating a lot lately and also about his falling. She looked concerned and had gotten our Doctor on the phone, walked out of the room and came back in telling us that they were pulling Charlie off of the pain med he was on. Later on, Charlie had fallen asleep and woke up briefly while Steph and I were talking. He started to hallucinate while she was in the room. She looked at me and asked if this was what I was talking about? Long story short, our Doctor walked in our room at the tale end of him hallucinating witnessing this for himself. He asked me if Charlie had been having headaches and I told him, "No." Steph told me to tell our Doctor about Charlie falling the previous week. Our Doctor was a little concerned and mentioned a brain scan if the hallucinating didn't quit with the change of pain meds. *Note ~ the hallucinating and falling (which was one time) has stopped. That was just the first day.
As Tuesday came, Charlie seemed a little down which I thought was understandable. He was tired too. Then Wednesday came and PoW! During the day he seemed quiet, but he was also sick and slept through most of it. He tried to eat a little dinner and then we took a walk inside the hospital. On the way back to his room, he let me know he didn't want to finish his chemo treatment, he wanted to go home and that he was tired. He was done with it... I just didn't see that one coming. We talked our way through it and I stayed with Charlie in the hospital for the rest of his chemo treatments. Charlie's guard was down, he was was weak and fragile. It was so hard seeing him like this and it scared me. I spent a lot of time just crawling into his bed and holding him. He got through it and we got to go home!
One of the side effects to chemo is feeling anxious and not being able to sleep, and even though we had gotten a couple of prescriptions to help with that, it was still a rough weekend. He weighed 124 lbs. Saturday and was very weak. Monday and Wednesday of this week, my mom came and helped me which was a great comfort to both Charlie and I. Thank you mom!
Charlie said he didn't want to do his chemo treatment Tuesday. I told him we were to close to the finish line to stop. He didn't think the two chemo treatments that were left would make that much of a difference. I told him it could be the one that did. He had his chemo yesterday. We have one more next week. Charlie's spirit is up and he has gained two pounds. I am so proud of him!
Big exhale ~ Remember to breathe Angela
Again ~ Thank you! I really do appreciate all of your comments. They mean so much to me!
(((bunches of warm hugs to you)))